when will i be over you?

no one knows how hard it is to make yourself believe that everything's okay..
to fake a smile..
to crack jokes..
to pretend that you are the strongest of them all..
i just dunno what to do..
should i cry?
and make others see how weak i am..
or should i fake a smile?
and make them all believe that i am over you..
oh hell..
why do you have to do this to me in the first place?
i dont deserve this, sweetie..
oh, if only i can throw you outta this planet, i would have done that a long time ago!
so i would not see you anymore..
so i would be able to forget you..
so i would finally be over you..
but, hell!
i know i cant..
how can i do that if i dont even know how to put you outta my mind?
if i dont even know how to stop myself thinking of you..
if i dont even know how to close my eyes whenever you are near so that i wont have to see your handsome face anymore..
if i dont even know how to accept the fact that you were never mine..
oh man..
if only you know how much it hurts to realize that..
i am not me anymore..